The REAL blog for today

I’m sorry to be posting two blogs at once- I’m sure the departure from the norm is annoying to some of you, and I’m sorry. I DID write a nice little blog last week, which I’ve just posted, but Blogger was closed down for repairs, so I couldn’t post until now. I know- even on the internet things break down and have to be repaired!

But anyways, here I am once again. And this time I am writing on a Friday night; Roman has just showered and headed to bed- I can still smell his body wash mingling with the litterbox and the smoky smell of burning garbage just beyond our doors. Somehow this is comforting. Don’t ask.

I am also absorbed in a magnificent recording of Brahms 3rd Symphony. It is the London Symphony Orchestra directed by the talented Ms. Marin Alsop. It’s rare to find a female in the pro-leagues of conducting, which goes to show you that even in the liberal world of the arts women still have far to go towards equality. (And this is in no way an endorsement for Sarah Palin!) This recording, however, is fabulous. I can hear every nuance, crescendo, decrescendo, and even the dovetailed entrances that make Brahms the incredible composer he was.

If you have never heard Brahms 3rd, then you either need to go buy this recording, or find out when the closest local symphony is playing it and get the tickets ordered. If you play a stringed instrument, then you need to join an orchestra that plans to play it. Once you’ve made the necessary arrangements to get your ears around it, then get into a comfortable seat and crank up the volume.

The first movement of the symphony itself is a masterwork and deserves to be played alone. From the dramatic first few seconds, Brahms wraps his listeners up into a tempest of emotion. I defy any human with a heart to listen to this movement and not feel, for one second, that you’re taking a glimpse into the divine. The rich and sumptuous harmonies give every measure a depth that is awe-inspiring. Listen to the strings- the way the violins work together in the upper reaches of their ranges, the violas dig into the low ends of their instruments, the cellists play demanding runs all over the instruments, and the glorious low basses finish everything off. It’s magnificent.

And it only gets better. The second movement is gentle and nostalgic, with a simple theme and variation reminiscent of the great opera arias of Puccini and Verdi. It’s all so rich- he begins so simply that it is almost shocking, and then he adds layers upon layers to the fabric. I love these endless dimensions. Perhaps it is the depth of Brahms and Mahler that make me adore their music over the ever-popular Mozart and Beethoven. Don’t get me wrong- I like those guys too, but Brahms, Mahler, and Dvorak…they have “oomph!”

Which, in a roundabout way, brings me to my point for this week.

I have feelings for Limon. Despite the paranoia, the language I’m still wrestling to understand, and the garbage men who are on strike AGAIN, I am once again developing deep feelings for this place. I don’t know where they came from, or how they came to be so very deep, but there they are again, as if they never left. Roman and I do not see eye to eye on this; don’t get me wrong- he loves the people here, but I caught him thrice referring to the house in Limon as “home,” and he immediately recanted each time! I guess I just don’t get it- I understand the adage that home is where the heart is, but is there something wrong with making everywhere you go a home?

My love for Limon is a lot like Brahms 3rd, I think. It’s deep, it’s rich, it’s stark in contrast to what I’m used to, but the comparison perfectly captures my personal zeitgeist. It is, at times, melancholy like the end of the second movement- but it is also bold and thriving in the face of adversity like the thrilling counterpoint of the first movement. And like the way the last measures of each movement gracefully come to a peaceful and warm close, I have every reason to believe that this experience will be one that I look back on with happiness and nostalgia.

My companion, on the other hand, lives firmly in North Carolina. He is here in body, but his heart is split between the wonderful students we teach here and his life back home. Sometimes I admire the way he seems to be prepared for whatever is waiting for him when he returns, but sometimes I am exasperated (and he knows this, so I’m not dishing any secrets) by his drive to plan and look ahead. He is an excellent teacher and he is anxious to see what God has got in store for him back stateside, but I wonder if looking SO far ahead means that he will miss some of the blessings he is being given right here. At any rate he is who he is, and I am who I am. I like Brahms and he…well…I guess he’s more of a Bach kind of guy. He likes planning. And he’s not bad at math either.

Speaking of my companion and his proclivity towards planning, the man is doing a stellar job with his new theory class. My advanced students, while they’re pretty impressive, are nothing compared to the beginning theory classes he is teaching. They are active, engaged, and really getting the material. He has certainly been blessed with the gifts for this mission. You know, sometimes I wonder if I’m just here to keep him company while he does the real work at the school. He lives for lesson plans, and me? Well…if you know me, then you know the answer to that question!

Anyhow, Brahms 3rd is over now and I’ve enjoyed all of it- the clashing climaxes, the dissonance, the fire and passion, and even the tranquility of it all. You see, something I have learned about myself here is that I like the process of living. I love where I am, and who I’m with, and what I’m doing most of the time, whether that is in Limon or Greensboro, or even Nashville. I know that life has its intricacies, its problems, its tempests, and havens. Like the Brahms, It’s full of erratic rhythms, crashing cymbals, blaring horns, diminished triads, and even the occasional hemiola. From far away it’s a big ole mess, but on closer inspection it is a stupendous feat of organization and passion…and it’s mine to enjoy whenever and wherever I please. So here’s my adage: Home may be where the heart is, but it’s up to you and your heart to decide where you make your home!